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Restroom Signs These are the actual signs found in the rest rooms across the country.

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   Restroom Signs

Friends don't let friends take home ugly men.
-Women's restroom, Starboard, Dewey Beach, DE

Remember, it's not, "How high are you?" it's "Hi, how are you?"
-Rest stop off Route 81, West Virginia

No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired ofputting up with her shit.
-Men's Room, Linda's Bar and Grill, Chapel Hill, North Carolina

Make love, not war.-Hell, do both, get married!
-Women's restroom, The Filling Station, Bozeman, Montana

A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or testicles, you'regoing to have trouble with it.
-Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort, Dallas, Texas

Watch out for Gay Limbo Dancers
-Inside toilet stall door, Men's restroom

Express Lane: Five beers or less
-Sign over one of the urinals, Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hills, CA

You're too good for him.
-Sign over mirror in Women's restroom, Ed Debevics, Beverly Hill, CA

No wonder you always go home alone.
-Sign over mirror in Men's restroom, Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hills, CA

The best way to a man's heart is to saw his breast plate open.
-Women's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

If you voted for Clinton in the last election, you can't take adump here. Your asshole is in Washington.
-Men's room Outback Steakhouse, Tacoma, Washington

Beauty is only a light switch away.
-Houghton Library, Harvard University, Cambridge, Massachusetts.

If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, thenlet's all get wasted together and have the time of our lives.
-Armand's Pizza, Washington, D.C.

God made pot. Man made beer. Who do you trust?
-The Irish Times, Washington, D.C.

At the feast of ego, everyone leaves hungry.
-Bentley's House of Coffee and Tea, Tucson, Arizona

It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
-Written in the dust on the back of a bus, Wickenburg, Arizona.

If voting could really change things, it would be illegal.
-Revolution Books, New York, New York

Don't trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die.
-Men's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

What are you looking up on the wall for? The joke is in your hands.
-Men's restroom, Lynagh's, Lexington, KY



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