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Random acts of Weirdness These are actual sentences taken from letters received by a large city's Welfare Department in applications for support:

1. I am forwarding my marriage certificate and six children. I have seven, but one died which was baptized on a half sheet of paper.
2. I am writing the Welfare Department to say that my baby was born two years old. When do I get my money?
3. You have changed my little boy to a girl. Will this make a difference?
4. I cannot get sick pay. I have six children. Can you tell me why?
5. I am glad to report that my husband who is missing is dead.

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   Random acts of Weirdness

6. This is my eighth child. What are you going to do about it?
7. Please find for certain if my husband is dead. The man I am now living with can't eat or do anything till he knows.
8. I am very much annoyed to find you have branded my son illiterate. This is a dirty lie as I was married a week before he was born.
9. In answer to your letter, I have given birth to a boy weighing ten pounds. I hope this is satisfactory.
10. I am forwarding my marriage certificate and three children one of which is a mistake as you can see.
11. Unless I get my husband's money pretty soon, I will be forced to live an immortal life.
12. In accordance with your instructions I have given birth to twins in the enclosed envelope.

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